With celebrities coming out as non-mongomous and personal situations with friends and acquaintances, I decided to learn more about polyamory. Questions to poly and/or open relationshiped people, some online reading and more took me to Tikva Wolf. Their work, Ask Me about Polyamory: The Best of Kimchi Cuddles, I learned a few more things in a safe environment. Their non-technical, non-textbook format allowed me to stop and think, allowing me to understand things on an easier level than in academic forms. This led me to their work, Love, Retold.
Which is a good book to get you thinking about Love Positive relationships. Things are less technical and more poetic. Even the images of the illustrations are a bit mystical at times, fun and speak the story as well, even when they are slightly more simpler in details. The colors really pop (they are deeply rich) and help show things are a love letter to Wolf’s relationships (her partners and metamours).
While I am curious about all of the relationships Wolf has had, the partner that interests me perhaps the most is her husband, a man who is/was mostly monogamous and (obviously) married to a poly person. He has a line about “Poly propaganda” that spoke to me, as a lot of what I have read is propaganda. They only praise the positive and the high of what happens, never letting you see the downsides. Since this sentiment is coming from this person, I felt it actually might just get you to think outside of that box, as you can honestly step out of your comfort zone and look at it from his perspective. And that perspective is someone who starts to see the pros of polyamory.
Will this (or As Me about Polyamory) “convert” you? Of course, not as you are or are not suited for this kind of relationship. However, it might help you see that multiple loves are not as foreign or alien as we might think compared to monogamous relationships.
