I cannot tell you how you will survive without me. I cannot tell you how to mourn me. I cannot convince you to not feel guilty if you forget the anniversary of my death, or if you realize days or weeks or months have gone by without thinking about me. I just want you to live.
― Adam Silvera, They Both Die at the EndI guess I could call this energy freedom. No one will be around to judge me tomorrow. No one will send messages to his friends about the lame kid who had no rhythm. And in this moment, how stupid it is to care hits me like a punch to the face.
― Adam Silvera, They Both Die at the End
Bingo Blackout
CBR15Bingo: Getaway (replacing Take the Skies)
Oh, this book. I loved this book. If you start out knowing that your heart will be broken by the end, do you still read the book? I did and I’m glad for it.
This is a book about death: a book about the death of parents, siblings, partners, and friends. It is about missed chances, regrets, and being brave even when the world is ending.
It is sad as hell but beautiful in the way a good book, or a good song, can be.
We follow Mateo and Rufus, eighteen and seventeen years old, on their last day on earth. Every day after midnight, those who will die in the next twenty-four hours receive a phone call telling them that they have one day left. It is not a horror movie set up. The service, Death Cast, is considered helpful in that it allows people a brief amount of time to see their loved ones and make peace before dying. Rufus and Mateo receive their calls and are matched up using the Last Friend app, a service which helps you find what is essentially a death buddy.
The book takes place over twenty-four hours. Rufus cannot go home, and Mateo is terrified of leaving the safety of his apartment. With some coaxing, Rufus convinces Mateo to step outside and enjoy one last day in New York with him.
They are both plagued with doubt and fear. If you cannot live authentically on your last day, when can you? Mateo learns to be brave. Rufus forgives himself for being the lone survivor of the accident that killed his family, and for the things he did when his shame and rage pushed him toward violence. Together, they piece together snippets of joy as they switch between saying goodbye to the lives they lived and by taking something new and joyful for themselves.
Everything I’ve described sounds cliched and maybe it is. But the story is told in such an honest and tender way, I could not help falling in love with both of these boys as they found meaning in their final hours.
And that’s blackout! I am so happy I finally committed to this challenge after years of lurking. I read so many books that never would have crossed my radar. Thanks to Emmalita and team for tracking and updating us on this journey. You rock!
