mood music: Hector Lavoe – el dia de mi suerte
Aida Rodriguez’s Legitimate Kid is a beautifully written, heartbreaking memoir that recounts her life from childhood to motherhood. Raised in Miami, Rodriguez discusses the animosity she faced in her community and how these struggles affected her. This includes colorism within the Latine community, sexism from the men in her life, and even disparaging remarks from women who look down upon her as a “bastard child.”
Rodriguez details being raised by a mother who did not know how to survive life without the help of a man and often chose these men over her children. Her grandmother, who was the matriarch of the family, often had to save her from situations her mother put her in because her mother either couldn’t or wouldn’t. I was shocked by the day-to-day violence she faced, which required her to develop a tough exterior or become a victim of her circumstances. As she grows into adulthood, she stumbles to find her footing, becoming a teen mom like her own mother and falling for men who don’t have her best interest at heart. But Rodriguez can identify the crux of these decisions – she is looking for a father figure, one she never had in her own life. The title itself reflects this, as Rodriguez is her mother’s last name, and she struggled with the scrutiny from her community who placed judgment on her because of it. We come to find out, her father was in his late twenties when her mother, a minor at the time, became pregnant. Her mother was forced to become a parent when she was still a child herself, and that impacted her ability to provide the nurture and care her children needed. It began the cycle of dependency on others, especially men, that would continue through the rest of her life.
As someone who herself is trying to break the generational cycles prevalent in her own family, I found great solace in reading Rodriguez’s memoir. She is an example of someone who was born into less-than-ideal circumstances but was able to overcome adversity to create a path for success for future generations. One of the things I appreciated the most was her delving into topics that are all too common within the Latine community, including the expectations placed upon women. Not just including household responsibilities and becoming the perfect wife and mother, but also the emotional burden women in Latine communities have being in a culture that still contains rampant machismo. Through this memoir, Rodriguez forgives her mother for the decisions she made while raising her and her siblings, while simultaneously vowing to not commit the same mistakes with her children. I highly recommend this memoir, it’s been one of my favorite reads so far this year, and I wish Rodriguez continued success not only as a comedian but also as a writer.