“He was like a freezer item that had thawed too quickly on the outside and was melting everywhere, while the inside was still frozen solid. Somehow he was expressing more emotion than at any time in his life before, while simultaneously feeling less, feeling nothing.”
― Sally Rooney, Normal People
CBR15Bingo: Adulthood
CBR15Passport: Books from different countries
Connell and Marianne grow up together in the same small town in Ireland. Connell is the nerd and jock who hangs out with the wealthier, more popular kids. Marianne is the brilliant, sharp young woman who puts on a tough front to show that the bullies cannot hurt her. The two of them form a tentative friendship outside of school as Connell’s mother cleans Marianne’s home once a week. This friendship quickly turns into a friends-with-benefits situation, which is allowed to exist as the two of them, especially Connell, do not acknowledge their relationship, or even their friendship, at school. As expected, all of this falls apart in spectacular fashion.
The book follows their relationship as it evolves during their time at university. They both stumble through their own heartbreaks, but keep one another at a distance. Everyone around them can see that there is clearly something between them even if they cannot say it plainly. But either they are too afraid, or too stubborn, or too petty to admit what they feel for the other.
Connell and Marianne’s relationship is frustrating, and that is the point. They are figuring things out as they go. Even when they realize they’ve royally messed things up, they hide away from one another. Watching from the outside, it is easy to see how problems and misunderstandings could be resolved with a simple conversation, but egos and insecurities get in the way. The thing this book gets right is showing all of the minor slights and hidden kindnesses that are either misinterpreted or ignored outright. Perhaps it’s because the protagonists don’t see them or, because if they do, they choose to continue down the same path without accepting the friendship or affection from the other.
It feels as if the slights are magnified and the kindnesses are brushed off. Connell and Marianne are proud and egotistical – Connell is the one reaching out, mostly because he feels sorry for Marianne and because he feels guilt. Marianne pretends she isn’t hurt and, because of her abusive upbringing, feels somehow she deserves cruelty.
For me, this book is overrated. I have not yet watched the Hulu series and I’m not sure I will. Watching two people hurt one another over and over again isn’t something I’m sure I’m ready to deal with right now. It looks interesting but, after reading the book, I think there are other things that look more appealing to me at the moment.
