Having seen a number of women post about reading this book, and knowing that it’s a bit of a pop culture phenomenon at present, I wanted to see what all the hubbub was about. A friend of mine, noting my “currently reading” status on Goodreads was surprised to see me reading it and figured that it would not be my taste. She was not incorrect.
Hollis, for the unknowing, has created a global empire with a website, number of books, event planning business, etc. Essentially she is a lifestyle…guru? I don’t know what this profession is called. As a self-identified workaholic, mother, wife and Christian, she distills what she has learned into lies she has told herself, and illustrated how she has learned to be better and dispelled her own lies. Essentially by just, like, wanting it more than everyone else. I find her plucky, enthusiastic, preachy, and tiresome. Granted, there is some good stuff in there, about being as accountable to yourself as you would a friend, for example. I found that a helpful framing for self-improvement goals. But by and large, this book just tells you to mind over matter your problems and “use your tribe” and “vision board” your way to all your dreams coming true. Coolcoolcool.
I didn’t really know anything about Mrs. Hollis before picking up this book, so I took a quick pass to her web empire to see if her online persona was the same as what she was peddling in the book and I can say at least she is consistent. Case in point from her website, in an article about 8 secrets to a happy marriage.
Next, eliminate the reason for your arguments. I’ve told you guys before that Dave & I used to fight about cleanliness.. so we sacrificed things in our budget in order to hire a cleaning person. It sounds ridiculous in retrospect but neither of us wanted to clean the toilet and rather than battle over whose turn it was… we just got some help.
Sooo essentially, your advice is to use money to fix a problem that money can fix. WHY DIDN’T I THINK OF THAT. But maaaybe not everyone has house cleaner money? To give that advice without acknowledging that it’s not a solution most people can easily employ is obtuse and alienating, hence my analogy relating her to the hilariously out of touch Gwyneth Paltrow. If she was clear that she was an upper class woman writing for other upper class women, then fine, but that’s not her shtick.
Not to mention the fact that I have sort of started a personal tirade against the usage of the word “girl” as I have recently noticed how pervasive our (society) use of it is, and that fact that it infantilizes and demeans women. I’m guilty of it myself. I constantly refer to female colleagues, in their 30s as a “girl from work” but I never would refer to a male colleague as a “boy from work.” That’s messed up, y’all.
Hollis tries to paint herself as the small town girl, wide-eyed in the big city of LA, but , if you met your future husband before you were 20 and he just left Disney as the “Long time distribution chief” to manage your empire sorry, girl, you are masquerading down here with us regular folks. Maybe I sound like a killjoy but if the future is female that’s great, but hopefully we can have more representation and authenticity leading the charge.